Archive for the ‘Fashion Crime’ Category

Meg Can Take A Hint – She’s Giving Up The Plumpers!

Saturday, December 5th, 2009

MegRyan

After years of searching for the perfect pucker and coming up with a pathetic trout pout every time, Meg Ryan is saying good-bye to lip plumping!

And it’s only about 5 years too late! I mean, lets face it – the poor girl hasn’t just destroyed her lips. She can easily compete with the botox greats like Nicole Kidman, Teri Hatcher and Katie Price – but for some reason we can’t except her like we do them.

Of course, she should take that as a compliment – it’s because we hold her to a higher standard. We love her and expected her to rise above the Hollywood idea of perfection. We wanted her to stay sweet and soft and cute forever.

But now we know the truth – she is just like every other woman in the biz – susceptible to criticism and opinion.

And here I am talking my own line of shit – aren’t we awful?!

Meg – you’re perfect – don’t mess with perfection! I’m so glad your kissing the syringe good-bye!

Tig

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But Miley Is Usually So Classy!

Saturday, December 5th, 2009

miley_cyrus

I mean, examine exhibit A up there!

See what I mean, the epitome of morality and the perfect role model for America’s girls. Don’t you dream of your 16-year-old posing for “Morning After” photos?!?! I am personally monitoring my 10-year-old caloric intake – who needs a period when fashion covers are at stake?!

Anyways – Miley now has a brand new addition to her trailer court assesories – the under the boob tattoo!

Hers says “Just Breathe”

And she was recently photographed showing it off in her neon pink bikini while lounging pool side with pals.

Gotta love underage ink! Way to go Papa Cyrus – I’m sure you’re proud.

Tig

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Get Out The Eye Bleach – They’re Back Together

Saturday, December 5th, 2009

Roy Thompson Hall

I know – it’s not pretty and I’m sorry that I have to post about it.

Have you noticed that she is MUCH prettier when she isn’t with him?? I don’t know who he does it, but she always goes back to him. He must have some serious voodoo skills – cuz even great sex couldn’t perk my curiosity enough to consider him!!

But somehow she was able to overlook his recent psuedo Evan Rachel Wood snuff film/music video (Google Runing To The Edge Of The World) and has once again found herself within his creepy clutches!

Here is what Manson had to say to Metal Hammer -

Sometimes you feel awkward being what you’re best at, you feel like you have to be something new. But I think that a lot of people will agree that me being me at my best is what I need to be. I think that that really paid off because I’m back with Evan, that’s kind of breaking news, you can be the first one to say that.

Well – I spose we can always hope it’s not true. Poor girl…

Tig

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Katie Price Makes A Monkey Out Of Alex Reid In The Jungle

Tuesday, November 24th, 2009

Katie_Price_with_Alex_Reid

Not that Alex needs much help. With the cro magnon forehead and all the fake tanner – he does a pretty good job of it himself.

But Katie Price felt like lending him a hand by dumping him as she made her way out of the jungle earlier this week. Katie had been participating in Britain’s ”I’m a Celebrity – Get Me Out Of Here” when she decided to leave the show after being forced into elimination trials for the 6th time. But before she made her big announcement to the show, she made another announcement in her hotel room.

Even though Alex had flown in from Australia to reportedly propose to the model, she beckoned him to her hotel room to break his heart instead. She let him know that she is tired of him making cash off of her name and accused him of being a glory hound. Katie says -

“I have done a lot of reflection in the jungle. I realised it was best if I’m on my own. I don’t want a relationship.”

Um, yeah – like Katie Price has any right to dump a guy for trying to create celebrity out of nothing.

Anyway – friends are saying that Alex is crushed and he has already released a couple comments swearing his love was for Katie and not the bank accounts!

I think I would have more respect for the cross dresser if he just admitted he wanted the dollars!

We can only hope this won’t mean the end of public appearances from Alex’s alter ego Roxanne – cuz that bitch is HOT!

Tig

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Pam Tells Her Tots About Sex Tapes

Monday, November 23rd, 2009

PamGoRound

I don’t know why, but I thought this picture was beyond appropriate for this story.

Pam Anderson’s sons are 11 and 12-years-old now, so of course she figured this was a good time to break the sex tape news to them. Because, ya know – better to hear your mom is a cheap video whore from her than anywhere else! And since the tape is mentioned in Borat she was pretty sure they would hear about it.

“I knew kids were going to watch the film and there was a reference to the tape in the movie and they’re that age and, you know, people are going to start saying things,” Anderson said. “I just said, ‘Look, Mommy and Daddy were massively in love, we videotaped everything, everything was videotaped, and you’re probably going hear about something at school.’”

First of all - I doubt having sex with their father is the worst thing Pam is going to have to explain to her kids.  But is it really wise to let your kids think that’s what married couples do?! These boys will never be able to sit through a wedding without a serious case of immature giggles.

But my bigger issue is the fact that she was pretty sure the boys would find out after watching Borat. Why would she care about her kids finding out about a sex tape if she doesn’t care about her 11 and 12-year-old watching movies like Borat?!?!

She really is Mother Of The Year!

This just proves that Child Protective Services fails on a fairly regular basis.

Tig

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Sharon Osborne To Susan Boyle – “You Look Like A Hairy A**hole!”

Friday, November 6th, 2009

She kills me!

Can we cut to Sharon Osborne circa 1980-1999?!?!?

FatSharon

Ohhhhh that’s right, she looks a bit like a hairy asshole herself.

Give me a break Sharon, we can’t all make millions off our husbands and afford to spend $100,000 on an entirely new body!

Don’t get me wrong, I love me some Sharon, but I hate it when people forget where they come from. I have a funny feeling that Susan Boyle will take some of the MILLIONS she’s making off of her NUMBER ONE selling album and spruce her up image a bit. Or her agent will hire a stylist and stage a make-over intervention.

I agree that Susan Boyle isn’t exactly beauty pageant material. But aren’t we supposed to embrace the originals in life and NOT the imitators?!

In case you aren’t sure what Susan Boyle looks like -

SusanBoyle2

Tig

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Lady Gaga Kills A Photographer

Friday, November 6th, 2009

 LadyGaga

K, so that might be a slight stretch of the truth….

But a photographer DID die after taking pictures of the singer/freak show in New York on Tuesday. It seems that Gaga walked down the runway during an event at Cipriani 42ndStreet wearing another of her signature outrageous outfits, and the photographer, A.J. Sokalner, was there to catch shots of the show.

Apparently he got more than he bargained for when he suffered a massive heart attack while packing up his equipment.

The agency that employed poor A.J., ACE Pictures denies that Lady Gaga had anything to do with his heart condition. The told Access Hollywood –

“He finished shooting [the event], he was packing up his cameras and he died of what is believed to be a fairly major heart attack – The event was finished, he wasn’t on the ladder, it was nothing to do with Gaga.”

They also claim that he had a history of poor health recently.

I liked the story better when he died from the shock of Lady Gaga’s crazy outfit. Damn it..

Tig

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More UFC Stars Should Dress Like Alex Reid!

Sunday, November 1st, 2009

RoxanneViaDlisted

I totally stole this picture from Dlisted.com

Do you read Michael K?? If you don’t, you should! He kills me!

This is “Roxanne,” UFC fighter Alex Reid’s alter ego. Alex has been dating the UK’s Queen of Class, Katie Price for a while now. Lately, Alex has been seen out and about sporting his feminine side, and last night he threw on this fabulous, fishnet and leather ensemble and took his hot ass out on the town!

I was going to talk a little shit, but realy – I just respect the hell outta the guy. I mean, I would never be caught dead in my bedroom in that outfit – but he has the balls (pardon the pun) to rock it like Rupaul with pride.

You have to see the rest of these pictures – head over to Dlisted.com to see them all!!

God I LOVE Halloween!

Tig

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We Get It Adam, You’re Fabulous!

Saturday, October 31st, 2009

AdamLambertWTF

Except you kinda have stubby little sausage fingers. Maybe next time you shouldn’t make them such a focal point.

Anyway – here is the latest in “shocking” covers from American Idol winner, Adam Lambert’s, new single “For Your Entertainment.” Adam has already said that he pulled from multiple “glam” icons from the 80’s as inspiration for the photos.

This one is actually a little less “Hello world, I like boys!”, and I for one kinda like it! It’s about time the guys got to be as fab as all the ladies. Besides, anything that makes the staunch conservatives nervous gets my love! And trust me, Adam is making a lot of up-tight mommies squirm.

His skill with black eyeliner and mascara makes ME a little nervous – or jealous, either way.

I still think he has fat fingers, and that’s not so fab. But I’m going to TRY to overlook it.

Tig

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Seriously.. Where Is Taylor Momsen’s Mother?!

Thursday, October 22nd, 2009

TaylorMomsen

 

Put the 20 back in your pocket boys, this little girl is only 16 years old! Who in the hell let’s their 16 year old out in public like this?!

This is Taylor Momsen on the set of that show Gossip Girl – and I know that some of you will defend her by saying, “It’s for a TV show!” But ummm, isn’t that even worse?! And it’s not like we haven’t seen her out in public in worse! Whats next? Her sex tape?  

This sexy teens trend has got to end! It makes me sick! Let our litle girls be little girls. They don’t have to play with Barbies till they turn 18, but can we stop dressing them up for nasty old men to drool (and much much MUCH worse) over?!

Just another case of Hollywood parents that want a fat bank account instead of a healthy kid.

SO SAD

Tig

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