Posts Tagged ‘Michael Lohan’

Michael Lohan To Testify Against Bad Dad BFF Jon Gosselin

Monday, November 9th, 2009

BadDads

TLC needs the help of Super Dad of the Century, Michael Lohan, to help nail Bestest Baby Daddy, Jon Gosselin’s chopped balls to the wall.

TLC is going after Jon for his questionable dealings while he was still under contract with them. Michael and Jon were in talks to possibly star in a show of their own called “Divorced Dads Club.” Here is what Michael had to say-

“I was working on a deal with him for a Nutrisystem endorsement and a book deal. He got paid a lot of money for different promotions, clubs, magazines, and by a TV network – At times he said what we were doing was OK; at times he said it was a problem.”

He also claims that Jon was pain in cash for multiple personal appearances that were not OK’ by TLC.

So not only is Jon a crappy dad – but he’s a shitty friend too! I wouldn’t trust this guy with a fake two-dollar bill!

Tig

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Dina to Michael – “Shut Up About Lindsay and Pay Me Already!”

Sunday, October 18th, 2009

dina_lohan

Michael Lohan has been making the rounds, pleading his case for his poor little Lindsay. He’s told us how he is going to stage an intervention and save his daughter from herself. He’s told us how he is going to take down the evil doers that are supplying Lindsay with drugs. He even told Maury Povich that he’s afraid he is going to bury Lindsay before long if he doesn’t get her clean. Saying he would steal her away if he wasn’t so afraid of being charged with kidnapping!

 Well, Mother Of The Year Nominee, Dina Lohan, has had about enough of his cry baby crap. Apparently Dina is ok with Lindsay being a coke head/pill popper, druggie, has-been and she is defending her little girl the only way she knows how - by doing a little smack talking of her own. Telling People.  –

 ” Michael Lohan needs to focus on being a parent, paying child support, of which he is six months behind, and making up for all the years he was an absentee dad, and stop going on national television talking about his children publicly.”

 I’m pretty sure she gave that comment to People via a text message. A text message that she thumbed while shouldering her way to the front of the line at a posh Hollywood nightclub she was sneaking her 15-year-old daughter into. Her willingness to take a quick break from fame whoring the young one to defend the old one proves that she means business!!

 Give me a break people… like Dina Lohan has ANY right to tell ANYONE to focus on being a parent! We all know that Dina chops out lines for Lindsay while pouring drinks for Ali, but that’s not exactly the kind of multi-tasking they talk about in Parenting Magazine.

 *sigh*

 Tig

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Bad Dad Convention 2009

Tuesday, October 13th, 2009

BadDads

That’s right, Jon Gosselin and Michael Lohan spent the weekend together. I’m sure they were just trading notes on how to be a shitty dad.

Seriously, what the hell is this about!? What could these two possibly have to say to one another? I have a feeling Jon called Michael and needed advice on how to deal with the impending drug addiction/fame-whoring that he sees in his children’s future. And really, who would be better at giving that advice than super dad Michael Lohan?

These two are actually perfectly suited for one another, I see a life-long bromance brewing here. Jon is great at ditching his kids to party and fame hunt, and Michael is great at driving his daughter to drugs then making bank on selling her sadness.

I’m predicting a new TLC reality series – “Michael & Jon = Wrong” 

Tig

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Michael Lohan Is Gonna Get Lindsay Clean!

Tuesday, October 6th, 2009

DaddyLohan

 

Doing what any loving, concerned, well meaning parent would do, Michael Lohan took to the tabloids to express his worry about Lindsay’s pill addiction. I know, when he’s wearing that shirt up there, it’s kinda hard to believe he would say or do something stupid right?!

Well, he blabbed the following to Radar -

I’m going to get her off the prescription drugs that she’s on. I hate it when people talk about illegal drug abuse… because it’s not just drinking and illegal drugs that kill you. Prescription drugs can destroy and kill a person and are sometimes harder to stop. Look at Heath Ledger and Michael Jackson.“ 

He went on to explain, without ever mentioning what pills she is addicted to, of course -

 ”You know why Lindsay’s not acting in feature films right now? Because she can’t. Because the girl with all the talent is hidden and buried deep inside this fungus that’s grown because of the prescription drugs. She can’t be herself. When you hug her she’s like, vacant inside. When she kisses or holds me I get chills, and not in a good way-in a bad way. She’s a different person. I was out there for a week when she was living at the Sunset Marquis Hotel and I would sit there and cry. It was horrible. This was not the kid I raised. “

He then goes on to say that those handling Lindsay are on the same level as the doctors that “killed” Michael Jackson and Heath Ledger. I’m thinking that most doctors don’t prescribe 8-balls of blow – but that’s just down here in Realityland!

By the way, isn’t it sad that he has to mention big name stars with real talent to gain attention for his now d-list daughter’s drug addiction?!?!

The entire family is pathetic!

Tig

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